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So...

I haven't shared this yet, but this week (starting this last weekend) has been a week of frustration for me.

I have felt frustration in many aspects of my spiritual walk ... in not seeing things happen, though I exercised all the faith I could muster. Questioning God about His asking me to write a book on healing, when I can't seem to get healed myself. Frustrated by the constant and building attempts by some folks in a certain denomination to resist the truth, and unknowingly persecute and offend those "little ones" Jesus talks about in the Scriptures, not in the defense of the actual word of God, but in defense of their traditions. And I found myself upset at God, on some level.... almost ready to quit on Him. I found myself struggling with doubts, unlike I have experienced ever in my life. I was having visions of walking away completely... serious. But then felt trapped because it would hurt so many people, and I couldn't do that, so I was mad at God that I was trapped!

Then, as I got to thinking about it ... prayed about it, I realized that I wasn't really upset at God, so much as I was tired of RELIGION.

My burden was feeling heavier by the day... and I was tiring of it.

Then my own words of counsel, which I gave to someone the other day, came back to haunt and bless me...
Jesus promised that His burden was light. If our burden become heavy, we have picked something up that He did not ask us to.

I was pondering that today. And, while talking to someone on the phone, and for the first time - daring to express my frustration, a revelation came to me.

I wanted to share it here, because it is not unique to me only, and may encourage someone else out there.

Tom - we talked about how it will take the POWER of the manifestations of the sons of God to finally silence the opinions, and establish His Kingdom.

I basically sat on that truth, thought about what that meant... maybe even used it as a kind of excuse to tell God I'm done until He empowers me or others to walk in much greater power, even as His Son, and the Disciples once did. I was getting ready to take that stance with God, because I didn't see my efforts having any effect.

Then it came to me what season we were in.

It is true that the Church abroad will not be able to truly change its course until Sons and Daughters arise, full of the Holy Ghost, and exercising the power of the gifts to a much greater degree, however.... that is not my burden at this time. I am to speak the truth to those who will hear and receive the word. (Even as the Still Small Voice) Not in shouting, debate, or argument. Not to convince those who are not ready to hear it. That is not my burden.
Those who receive the truth will be among those God will use to establish His Kingdom, and eventually turn the Church around.

Suddenly, my burden was lighter ... I realized that I'm not here to change the whole Church at this moment in time. I'm hear to share and assist those who ARE willing to hear the word of God, and experiment upon it. In time, those who set aside the traditions of men, and believe on HIM will be endowed from on High.

I don't know if I explained this adequately, or not... but I just got home, and wanted to share quickly before I collapse.
Blessings!